Chief Safety Officer Briefing

Before Hazel was born, Esther and I knew that life was going to change. We knew we would have baby-proof the house, but until this weekend we never knew how that would work.

As Chief Security Officer, it was my duty to take a look at the first two rooms that need to be baby-proofed: The living room and Hazel’s room. The results of my quick survey were horrifying! We live in a death-trap! Well, if you are a baby, just learning to crawl, scoot or in some other way locomote.

The first point of danger in our living room is the fireplace. Our fireplace is not a traditional style, built into the wall with a step in front, but is open on two-sides, essentially part of an island. With it being winter and our house having some but not enough insulation, we have been running our fireplace to keep away the creeping cold.

Hazel + Fire ≠ Good.

We bought the equivalent of the Baby Super Max Prison, not that we are “those” parents, but local “R Us” store did not have a large selection of gates, enclosures or other barriers.

Now our fireplace Hazel is protected by metal bars that can be formed into a small playpen (or large playpen, an option, I am now referring to as “The Yard”).

The item that really motivated this flurry of safety related acquisitions was the lowering of Hazel’s crib. She isn’t sitting up yet, but she has managed to put herself into an uncomfortable faceplant that will eventually lead to her sitting up by herself. The upper setting on the crib was great when she wasn’t as active (it was also a back saver), but now with her ability to wiggle/faceplant/sit, lowering the crib was necessary.

Lowering the crib exposed on small problem: The power unit for the baby monitor/spy camera. Our little girl is on her way to being a pickpocket a la Oliver Twist, so her attention was immediately drawn to the power supply. Luckily, manufacturers have kept up with the rise in child pickpockets and we installed a secure cover over the power supply, meaning that Hazel will have to become far more dexterous to complete her master plan without our supervision.

Esther and I are very “wired” people. That means not only do use a lot of technology, we also have a lot of power cables. This has become Hazel’s current obsession (besides the cats), as evidence below.

More scootin’ from esther benoit on Vimeo.

Her love of power cords means that we have to employ some power strip locks and other “hardened” technologies to keep her away, as well as be more vigilant about what we leave lying around. Really, we all know, the latter part is going to be near impossible.

The last thing that was critical to buy was table bumpers. Our coffee table, while nice looking and very functional, is the equivalent of razor blades and broken glass for a baby learning to walk.

While walking is a while a way, it was is the same way for a baby crawling, so we have not enrobed our coffee table with spongy goodness.

This concludes the Cheif Safety Officer’s first briefing. We will keep you up to date with all of the security systems implemented at Alcatraz the Benoit house.

Boom De Ya Da!

When Hazel was a newborn, we found that singing to her would calm her and help soothe her to sleep. Esther has a small problem with this: She can’t remember the lyrics of songs. An unfortunate malady when you are soothing a crying baby.

In my search to find a song we could both sing, I randomly started sing the jingle from a Discovery Channel advertisement. It was both rhythmic and memorable.

We thought we would have to sing the song for a few months, but now that Hazel is smiling, we are singing it more now than ever. The video is below to give you an idea of what makes Hazel grin as big as she can.

The verse is not important, making it up as we go is par for the course, the chorus is everything!

Being a dad

When Hazel was born, my world was thrown into a tail spin. I knew it was coming, I knew that it wasn’t going to be easy, but it was overwhelming. I was home with Esther and Hazel for 3 weeks and in that time I got used to the idea of having a daughter, but I was still not really comfortable with her.

Comfort is an odd thing. Old shoes, comfortable, worn-in jeans, very comfortable. Learning to live with a baby, not comfortable.

Esther and I were talking about the hormonal rush that mothers get, how it helps them through the difficult first weeks. The surge of chemicals do some magic things, helping Esther get through the late nights, the sometimes painful feedings, the lack of personal space. The only problem with the post-baby hormones: Dad’s aren’t evolved enough to get them as well.

Please don’t think I was aloof or uninterested in Hazel, far from it. Hazel and I had a special bond, she and I understanding how to get her to go to sleep. The difference was that my body didn’t give the extra kick after the adrenaline wore off. That feeling was similar to “hitting the wall.” I know Esther hit the wall, but somehow she managed to push through it, at times leaving me feeling like a bad father.

I have grown into being a father, just as Hazel has grown and changed. Now, I am very comfortable with her, I just had to get used to having a second lady in my life. Now, our bond is larger than just me being able to rock her to sleep. We have conversations and yes, she does talk back. She laughs at her father’s stupid jokes and we enjoy snuggling. We like eating together, when I feed her and when she watches me eat in an exaggerated fashion.

Now that Hazel is 100 days old, I can say that I am happy to be a dad. I love my daughter in a way that now lets me understand the hormonal rush that new mothers get. I understand why animals can be so protective of their young. I understand a lot more about being a dad. After the first few week, I have a better understanding of the kind of patience it can take to raise a child, the amount of love you need to give a child and most importantly, the amount of fun it can be.

I need a shot

Thursday was Hazel’s first set of shots. Esther and I knew she had gotten bigger than her last appointment, both in weight and length, but we were not ready for the measurements: 12 pounds and 2.6 ounces, and 22.5 inches. Wow! That explains why she has been sleeping so much better (research shows that once a baby reaches about 12 pounds, they can sleep through the night).

Back to the shots, with Hazel clad only in her diaper, the three of us waited for the five shots to be prepared. Yes, five, two in the each leg and one in the arm. A shot is a little anxiety producing for me, but five, that is down right scary. With a shot for every infantile disease, Hazel was in for a … treat.

Mom didn’t want to hold Hazel, it would just be too hard, so I was left that pleasure. Hazel, sitting on my lap, gets held by Dad to stop her from flailing around, while the first shot is administered. It took a second for Hazel to realized what was going on but when she did, the tears and crying started. Hazel looked around for comfort and calmed down immediately with some soft whispers from me and Mom. The nurses then held each leg as they prepared to administer the second and third shots. This is where the screaming began.

Remember when Hazel was born, we said that she had some impressive lungs? Yeah, they haven’t disappeared or gotten any weaker as she has grown. No, they were in fact more impressive than they have ever been. I now know what a cry of pain sounds like, and having to hear it three times in a day was a little rough.

She had the final four shots administered in rapid succession and responded like any baby would. I was worried that rest of the appointment would be difficult due to her uncomfortable state, but Esther and I were able to calm Hazel down before our doctor arrived.

The rest of the appointment was routine, kind of boring after the shots. The rest of the day, in her recovery, Hazel was remarkable. She was not nearly as fussy as people had led us to believe she could have been. She was awake most of the day, taking short catnaps instead of her normal nap schedule. That was made up for that night with a solid seven hours of sleep.

Her system has seemed to be a little off since then, but as I am writing this, Hazel has finally overcome any lingering side effects. The shots were scary, not for Hazel, she doesn’t know. It was scary for Mom and I. I know Mom cried a little and while I didn’t shed a tear, it was very hard to hear her scream in pain. I’m glad she’s recovered, and I don’t look forward to her 4 month appointment, as it involves 5 more shots.

Frustration sets in.

I think I can speak for both of us when I say, frustration is starting to creep in. This probably isn’t a good fit with our hypnobirthing. We are about 10 hours from the due date and at 9:15 tomorrow we will be at the doctor’s office. We should find out how Esther has been progressing. Hopefully there has been significant progress and as soon as the doctor does his exam, he says we should go check ourselves into labor and delivery.

The weather has been really hot recently, which is making life difficult. It is hard to keep cool and that only adds to the frustration. It is hard to go “walk the baby down” when it feels like you could keel over dead from the temperature outside. The humidity hasn’t been very high, in contrast to the temperatures, I guess it is good that this is near the end of the pregnancy.

We will write about our appointment tomorrow, or not depending on the outcome… we may be a little busy.

Hippobirthing

The third person voice in this post is because Jered and Esther are writing this jointly. Generally the paragraphs that sound better are written by Esther, the ones that appear to be written by someone with a basic grasp of English are written by Jered. You have been warned.

Friday was our 34 week doctor’s appointment- our second appointment at the new practice we’ve switched to. We met with the nurse midwife for the first time and were incredibly impressed with how the appointment went. Part of the reason we switched practices was because we were having a very normal pregnancy and were treated as though we did not exist. Our experience at the new practice has been completely different. First, there are only two practitioners- the OB and the nurse midwife. Both of whom seem very nice and caring. They both have taken time to talk to us about our pregnancy and answered all of the questions we had, another reason for switching practices.

After introducing ourselves to the Nurse Midwife, Darleen, Esther explained our thoughts on a med-free birth if possible. Darleen immediately jumped in and started telling us about hypnobirthing (which Grammy J Benoit later misheard as “hippo-birthing”. Thanks, Grammy J). Jered started to giggle, not at the concept of hypnobirthing, but the fact that Esther had been talking about hypnobirthing from early on in the pregnancy. Darleen has had two couples who have used the techniques, both effectively, and she gave us a website and book to research.

The rest of the appointment was routine, although Esther and baby are measuring about two weeks ahead. It was nice to be comforted by Darleen, who said that doctors, nurses and the like generally over estimate baby’s size and weight in women who are under 5′ 5″ (Esther is 5′ 4″) and women who have a standard or short sized torso (which Esther also has). So all in all, the measurements maybe off a little, but the baby is still on track.

Jered and I decided to do a bit more research into this hippo-birthing process and went over to our local book store to see what materials were out there. We found the book our midwife had recommended and decided to go ahead and buy it after browsing it and finding that this method of natural childbirth is one that is very congruent with our thoughts and feelings about pregnancy and childbirth. We have been reading the book all weekend and decided to try and contact one of the local hypnobirthing instructors. We were not sure we would be able to do the class in hypnobirthing as it usually takes 5 sessions- but we got an e-mail back from the instructor today and she is willing to teach it to us in 2-3 sessions

The Hypnobirthing book, Hypnobirthing: The Mongan Method, by Marie F. Mongan is very inline with what Esther and Jered think about the birthing process, particularly after watching The Business of Being Born. Mongan discusses the “medicalization” of birthing and how 99% of pregnancies are normal, requiring little medical intervention, but due to the way childbirth has been formed into a hospitalized experience, interventions and drugs are quite common.

We are excited about the hypnobirthing classes and the tools they will give us as we try to have an un-medicated birth. We are getting ready for the baby to get here and are surprised at how quickly time has gone and time continues to go by as we get closer and closer to B-Day!

Dad’s Baby Purchases

This is my first video post. You may be asking yourself, but who was the voice of Lamb Chop in the first two episodes of The Lamb Chop Show? Not me.

I’m not sure how video is going to work if you are subscribed by email, so please visit the website: http://baby.b3noit.com/pregnancy/dads-baby-purchases/

Basically, Esther and I have been making purchases to get ready for the baby. First it was some baby clothes, with much thanks to Esther’s Aunt Pat. We also ordered the super snazzy Flip Video, it is a super simple to use video camera, and how we are going to share moving pictures of the baby with everyone.

The DadGear bag was the best buy of the lot, in my opinion. Now I feel like I can take the baby out by myself. That combined with the DadGear Vest, I’m a dad ready for when the little one gets here.

A letter to baby

Now that the B.A.B.I.E.S. class is over, I think the embargo has been lifted on a letter I wrote during the class. This letter should be delivered to the baby when he or she is born.

Dear baby,

Hello, welcome, we have been very excited about you getting here. I can’t wait to get you home where your Mom and I can really have fun with you. We have 2 cats and a dog and you’ll get to know them well, you can even ride the dog like a cowboy or girl rides their horse.

We have a puppet for you and not to put any pressure on you, but your great grandparents are expecting a show, but not right away.

Your Mom and I hope that we are good parents albeit hippie ones. We are always trying to do our best to give you the things you need. I’ll be at home for the next two weeks. You and I can spend lots of time together, and don’t worry after I go back to work, we’ll still have lots of fun, like the doggie rides.

I think the baby class ladies want us to eat cheese cake now. It is not a regular thing, don’t worry.

Love,

Jered / Dad

Trekkie baby

Esther and I have been watching a lot of Star Trek: Voyager, particularly since we got pregnant. Esther made an observation tonight: The baby will probably only be soothed by the theme music to the show.

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Lifesavers

Last night, Esther and I went to our second-to-last babies and birthing class. When we showed up, one of the couples that we started the class were their with their new baby. He was adorable, and I feel comfortable in my manliness saying that. He had a full head of dark hair and was a beautiful little boy. It was also very nice to hear from a father who was a little squeamish about the birthing process, and I think Esther got something from hearing how she got through birthing.

Back to the class, Esther and I were the only ones there, which felt like Survivor. I was waiting for Jeff Probst to walk out and tell us that we had out played, out witted and outlasted everyone else. Last night was the CPR class, which I thought would have brought people out of the wood work, but we got a private CPR lesson.

It was nice to have the one-on-one attention, I think Esther and I are both super ready should something happen, but we always hope to never have to use those skills.